Is Sex Between Women More Pleasurable? Let’s Talk About It
by Estef Palacios
For years, pleasure has been told through a very narrow lens: one that’s heteronormative, centered on the penis, penetration, and the male orgasm. But what about sex within the LGBTQ+ community?
A study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior found that 86% of lesbian women reach orgasm during sexual encounters, compared to only 65% of women in heterosexual relationships.
So, what’s behind this difference?
Less pressure. More communication.
In relationships between women, there’s often more open communication about what feels good, what doesn’t, and what each person truly desires.
In contrast, many heterosexual couples still struggle with shame or taboos that prevent them from exploring and understanding each other’s pleasure.
Talking about sex honestly—without fear of bruising anyone’s ego—changes everything.
More body empathy
Women understand, from experience, how female arousal works: that it’s not always immediate, that not everyone enjoys the same type of touch, and that lubrication varies.
This shared understanding makes intimacy more patient, more mindful, and more focused on genuine pleasure—not just on “getting to the end.”
It's not all about penetration
Most sexual practices between women aren’t centered solely on penetration, but on full-body stimulation.
The clitoris—that incredible organ with over 10,000 nerve endings—takes the spotlight, along with kissing, touching, grinding, toys, and oral sex.
There’s no single “right way” to do it. Each encounter can be different: more creative, more sensory, more free.
Pleasure lasts longer (and isn’t measured by orgasms)
For many, pleasure isn’t defined by climax alone.
There’s more foreplay, more exploration, a deeper emotional connection, and far less urgency.
It’s sex without a stopwatch: focused on feeling, not performance.
What can we learn from this?
Saying that lesbian sex is 'better' isn’t about comparison: it’s about rethinking what we consider good sex.
The traditional heterosexual model could learn a great deal from this approach: communication, respect, curiosity, and time.
Pleasure doesn’t have a sexual orientation: it has practice, attention, and care.
Anal play deserves patience and care. Learn how to prepare safely and comfortably—from hygiene and lube to communication and aftercare—so you can relax and truly enjoy the experience.
For centuries, female pleasure has been misunderstood, ignored, or treated as secondary in conversations about sexuality. Today, science and open dialogue are helping change that narrative. Discover why female pleasure is not only natural, but an important part of wellbeing, confidence, and personal empowerment.
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We grow up absorbing the idea that our “sexual peak” happens in our 20s. Culture frames youth as the golden era of desire, promising more energy, spontaneity, and novelty. But luckily, sexual wellness doesn’t follow a simple rise-and-fall curve. It evolves.
In a recent article, we’ve explored what squirting is, what it isn’t, and how many myths still circulate around the topic. Good news? Squirting isn’t a goal to achieve, but an experience that can result from the simple pursuit of pleasure. Bad news? If you’re pressuring yourself into experiencing it, chances are it’s going to be elusive.
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Whether you’re looking for answers for yourself or for your partner, let’s start with one clear point: difficulty reaching orgasm is common, and in most cases, it’s not a sign that something is wrong.
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